I'm a living and breathing paradox.
I short-circuit when I'm constantly surrounded by people. I lack the ability to function properly around big crowds. Small talks are not my cup of tea. And I dread meeting new faces more than anything.
At the same time, I crave genuine human interaction. The kind of connection where you feel lighthearted, willing to open yourself up without any reservation. A safe place where fear is non-existent and love is the only thing that matters . A haven where you can bear all your wounds and bruises, not because you need someone to tend to them but because you want yourself to recognize your pain.
I relish the moments when I can be left alone with my own thoughts. I secretly celebrate cancelled plans and nights out. I run out of energy dealing with other people's drama. So more often than not, I steer clear of human interaction.
However, there are times when I can feel elated receiving a surprise phone call from a dear friend. I get super excited planning a dinner date with my loved ones. Catching up with a high school classmate and talking for hours give me pure joy. Exchanging messages with a troubled friend, listening to someone's weak and shaking voice while crying, hugging a friend I haven't seen in a long time, hearing my family laughing at some lame jokes, seeing my mom's face from the side, making eye contact and giving a knowing smile when something is funny, bantering with my sisters about almost everything, having deep conversations with people close to my heart. These are some of the rare moments I can't be more grateful for.
And these rare moments are what we are here for. Human connection, is indeed the most precious gift there is.
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